15 DEC 2014 :: Another week

I want to get this done for the day. I am on the computer (had to review and try to submit my healthcare.gov application) and have other things to do. I was up until about 3 am catching up with the weekend online, and will need a nap later on (I think!).  :-)  

I haven't received my first check from Social Security and I am already hating the system.  :-(   This is not good.  ---   I thought  you would receive a check from the month you were eligible for it.  I thought you received your first check in the month that you had your birthday.  I made plans using that as the foundation.  Now that I have applied  (for early retirement), I have discovered that I am eligible for my first payment the month after my birthday, but it takes two months to get the first check.  That messed up my budget.  :-(

Today, just a little while ago, I finally went to the healthcare.gov site to finish my application. I had gone there on the 2nd of December to get it out of the way, but the computer wouldn't process it. Today was the deadline for renewals, so I hoped it would go well.  I had heard a program segment about the business side of the website that said you had to have every detail right or the computer wouldn't process it.  So, I decided to do a full review of my application and then try again.

I changed my income amount for 2015 because I thought that might be the problem.  I only counted the actual expected income (11 months of $375), but then decided the government may count January because it would be considered their January payment... so now I have $4500 to look forward to in 2015.   :-)   (as my income so far)

My other efforts have not resulted in income, so I didn't include them.  Not sure how that will change, but I hope that the problems will be dealt with soon.

I was finally able to go food shopping this weekend, so that was a need taken care of.  I have food variety again.  :-)  Not many food stamps left now, but enough for fresh fruits and veggies or any emergency need.

Poverty is a strange process.  I went for many years depriving myself as much as possible... I remember I finally made the decision to buy myself a treat each month... I think it started with a candy bar or something, and then I remember it grew to the specialty coffee I like.  It's hard to recall all those details anymore... it has been a long hard struggle with lots of bad memories and lots of prayers and lots of efforts. 

I guess I said that because I bought a lot of baking supplies and staples that I don't always buy.  I have been making bread again... so I bought some dark rye flour (it looks like white flour to me) to see how it works. I also bought some polenta, which I have never had before. I watched a cooking show about making graham crackers so I decided to see how graham flour works in bread and other recipes. I may try to make something like a graham cracker.  :-)  I really made a leap of faith in the health food arena when I decided to purchase some date sugar.  I like the concept of sweetening with dates, but have only tried one teaspoon so far in my coffee.  I think baked goods will be good...and the package says it is good on cereals.  It is like gold to my budget, so I will have to use it carefully.

I am single now. If I had children to care for and feed, I wouldn't be able to take these chances with the food money.  I still eat a lot of the pasta and other items I have eaten most of my life, but I am trying now to change to some better food options.  I eat a lot of brown rice now, and have just started eating steel cut oats.  I made my own granola when the kids were young, and our own granola bars. I also made my own bread and whatever else I could.

Our needs and abilities and options change with every age, location, and budget. Now I am trying to prepare for my senior issues and death.

I don't know what it will be like, I never expected to have the life I did...but I keep searching for GOD's purpose in all of it.  Somehow, this all has meaning in His Plans for my life, for our world, for the future.  I hope to see some good come of it, but I may have to wait until I get to heaven.

I do hope and pray that you will consider the needs of our world in your holiday celebrations.  Start thinking about your past, your present, and your future.  What matters most?  What has GOD created you for?  How can you make your life reflect the best of what you are?  ---  Make plans to change the things that are wrong in your life.  This is the best time to do that, we are starting a new year soon.